Hunh?
Uh, yes. I do believe that "quote" has long been taken out-of-context. I don't recall ever talking about this on any blog, though. What's the dilly?
 |
 |
 |
 |
||
 |
||
 |
|
Tuesday, August 31, 2004The comedy don't stop
Even when they're fighting, they're still funny. Well, one of them is funny, the other one seems to just be an ass. but without further ado, I present to you... Don't Have A Cow, Man (Harpers.org)
CNN Hates Fags
CNN won't air a Log Cabin Republican ad because it's "too controversial." Apparently, there's a scene from Matthew Shepard's funeral of a guy holding a sign that says "God Hates Fags" and that's just too much for the CNN brass to handle.
P.S.
Quick bit of proof as to the awesomeness of Trek VI, and the brilliance of Nicholas Meyer.
"Jim, they're dying," Spock tells Kirk in the movie's most electric moment, trying to persuade his comrade that the Klingon peace initiative is legitimate. "Let them die!" Kirk responds savagely. For a moment, try to imagine any other enduring movie hero, be it James Bond or Superman, portrayed in such an unflattering light. My new love
Okay, as everyone who reads this blog knows, I recently brought a child into my home. And by child, I mean this.
I'm working my way through most of the special features, and I can say without hesitation that one of the most interesting ones is the commentary track on Star Trek: The Motion Picture. Robert Wise actually talks for a good 90 minutes of this three hour mess. I'm amazed that the 80-something director could actually stay awake for the Motionless Picture, but more amazing still is how lucid he comes across. Wise's got that raspy, old-man voice, but he seems to remember the name of every obscure actor and SFX guy who worked on the film. Best of all, each time he talks about something big in the movie -- like the V'GER slit-screen sequence -- Wise sounds like he's reading off of prepared notes. And I'm pretty sure he is. There's something endearing about all this. I like the idea of Robert Wise staying up the night before his recording section and scrawling out notes on a legal pad so us young'uns can hear his wisdom. Still, all that said, ST:TMP really is a boring movie, and you need to be a true fan to even get through the Wise commentary. (And in case you're wondering Asa...Yes, the Nicholas Meyer commentary on VI is great. So too is the Shatner/Nimoy joint session for IV.) Tin Foil City
Zogby News!: Half of New Yorkers Believe US Leaders Had Foreknowledge of Impending 9-11 Attacks and Consciously Failed To Act.
Really? Wowsers. The GOP really did pick the wrong city for the convention. Monday, August 30, 2004Whaaaa????
I'm watching the McCain speech at the RNC. He just made a Michael Moore joke, everyone applauded, hooted, and hollared, and sure enough the camera cut to Michael Moore! Michael Moore is at the RNC?! He even tipped his cap to the booing (at this point, enraged) masses. Funny, memorable moment.
"Follow the Money"
Why, it almost sounds like John Kerry has ALREADY done more to combat terrorism than George W. Bush.
Golly. Not as pretty as it looked
It made for a moving image, but one former soldier-turned-undercover-protestor didn't care for the handling of those flag-draped faux-coffins.
Pallbearers were being recruited in haste. Flags were scraped on the concrete...If this was meant to be symbolic, I wondered what country it was supposed to mirror. Fallen American soldiers are treated with the utmost care. Meticulous casualty-handling procedures on the battlefield and at home are rehearsed and rehearsed. Honor and dignity are paramount. What a shame the Pentagon chose to black out this careful tradition, in which our national humanity shines so brightly. Perhaps then these protestors would have understood what it looked like to me when two volunteers tipped their casket on its end to get situated. These were not symbols. These were props. Nobody's gonna win
The latest results on Electoral-Vote.com aren't encouraging to Kerry, but they're not all that great for W either. The part of me that likes to live through great historical moments hopes this election actually goes to Congress for the final decision. The part of me that hates living in a 50/50 deadlocked nation hopes it doesn't.
Sadness
I heard this on NPR this morning: 'When asked 'Can we win?' the war on terror, Bush said,'I don’t think you can win it. But I think you can create conditions so that the — those who use terror as a tool are — less acceptable in parts of the world.'
This is one of the most honest things that I've ever heard Bush say about the War on Terror(ism), and it speaks to one of the main reasons I think it's simply dishonest to call it a War at all. What makes me sad is that I know, and you know it to, that if Kerry said this, this inherently true thing, the press would simply fucking savage him. Terrorism in the USSomeone threw a pipe bomb into a Stem-Cell Lab. And there are constant attacks on abortion clinics and doctors who perform abortion. These are terrorist attacks. Just because they are perpetrated by white folks who happen to agree with the President doesn't change that simple fact. How quickly we forgot Timothy McVeigh. If it were in LA I'd never leave
But if I'd never leave, does it really matter where it is?
Isotope - the comic book lounge is, quite frankly, just about the best place that anyone has ever come up with. I'll start from the beginning: A few months ago I read an article about an upcoming event at this place in San Francisco called "Isotope," where Ed Brubaker was going to arm wrestle people for comics in order to promote the TPB release of his truly magnificent work "Sleeper." (as a side note, go buy Sleeper vol. 1 and 2) "This place sounds awesome," I thought to myself, "and also I don't live in San Francisco." So due to work constraints I was doomed to miss that event. But fate would have it that by virtue of art and whimsy I headed up to SF this past weekend with some friends to see the Pop Art and William Eggleston exhibits at SFMOMA, as well as to stop by the Cartoon Art Museum, which is cool, but has an inordinate focus on Raggedy Ann and Andy. This was the moment for Isotope! Liz posits that when you walk in they hand you a Martini and a comic book and sit you down on a plush sofa. Alas it was getting to be later in the day, around 7 pm, by the time we were ready to get on the bus for Isotope. "Will it be open?" inquired my compatriots, doubters all. Hell, I didn't know. I just read about it on the internet. But the arm wrestling thing went til midnight, I remembered, and it is called a "lounge" so surely they're open until 10 or so. We had some very bad luck with buses, but finally got moving around 7:45. Maybe after Isotope will check out the Haight. Lauren tells me there are less people offering you drugs there now, which is too bad because I recall that being a major part of the atmosphere. They were the friendliest drug pushers I'd ever seen. When we get off the bus we turn out to be pretty much right across the street from Isotope. And it looks just like any other comic book store. Hurm. We walk in and the place is small. Smaller than my comic shop back in State College, PA. But physical size is nothing compared to a state of mind. We are immediately greeted by James, the suave suited proprietor who looks something like Dr. Strange's goofy younger brother. He's even got the Strange costume to prove it. James proceeds to offer us all a drink. "Tonight we're drinking whiskey and coke, would you like that, or something else?" My god. Liz was right. And so we drink. We sit and read and talk and drink. James tells us about the toilet seats on the wall, drawn on by the likes of Brian Wood and Warren Ellis. Now, about halway through my first drink, I introduce myself, at which point I learn that James' name is James, and that the other fine fellow in the store is named Danger Bob. Long story short (ha ha! This story is already long! I've spared you nothing!) we sat and talked comics and heard naughty stories about very famous comic book type people until about 11:30, at which time we thought it might be good to find some public transportation and work our way back to the car so we could get home. And James offered us a ride to the nearest BART stop. This is just about the nicest fellow that you can imagine, running a comic book store and throwing parties and giving ludicrous degrees of hospitality to total strangers from Los Angeles. What a completely flawless evening. Maybe it's time to move to San Francisco. Sunday, August 29, 2004Friday, August 27, 2004Go Lithuania!
Uhhh, and America too.
Argentina beats USA, which means that the winner of today's Lithuania/Italy game will play Argentina for Gold, and the loser will play the USA for Bronze. If Lithuania wins today it gaurantees their best basketball medal yet. Go Lithuania! Politicize this, bitch!
Well, it seems that Bush's use of the Olympics in campaign ads has angered the IOC enough that they almost certainly won't choose New York in 2012.
Frankly I think that's fine, because lord knows that there's no way New York City can handle the construction and traffic that's associated with the games. Has Bush ever done anything that hasn't just pissed off the rest of the world? War in Afghanistan is the only thing I can think of. Vote Fraud
And here I thought that was the new Bush/Cheney campaign slogan.
HAHHAHAHAHAHAHA! But seriously, here's a chilling little tale about how to hack a Diebold machine. This is probably the most pressing issue before us because it cuts to the core of whether or not we can actually trust our democracy to function. Very scary stuff. It also disheartens me that those in the house and senate who proposed international oversight of elections were swiftly rebuffed and in at least one case censured. If another country, coming off an election with dubious results in 2000, were to refuse international oversight I think that we would take that as proof that they were up to something. We're better than this. Mo' Cash
New Cash Milliondollars is here!
I'm about an hour over the technical thursday line, and about a day over the proper thursday morning delivery, but there are three of them, and they're about the Olympics. The Robot Olympics. So enjoy. Tuesday, August 24, 2004The Failed State We Overlook?
In this little satire, Transterrestrial Musings raises a very strange, very interesting question... Is France itself a failed state?
Sixty years after Paris was seized by the "Allies," and the beginning of the American occupation, France remains a failed nation, mired in political corruption and beset by vast pockets of Muslim extremism and anti-semitism, into which the gendarmerie fear to tread. The economy continues to struggle under economic policies driven by failed ideologies, and many of its best and brightest continue to flow out of the country, with only ex-dictators and their families, and hysterical movie stars willing to move there. Ultimate Nullifier!
Have you ever heard of the United States Nullification Crisis? Neither have I. Thankfully, WikiPedia has dirt on this curious chapter in constitutional law.
Monday, August 23, 2004Women Suck At Guitar
According to this WaPo article, at least. I actually find this strange; I always thought the gender imbalance in rock, though large, was not ENORMOUS. I guess Britney et al sort of pad out the numbers of women in pop/rock.
Reasonable people can argue about whether there are any guitar heroines, and you might insist that Jett, Mitchell and a dozen other women have earned the title. But what's beyond dispute is a stunning gender-related imbalance when it comes to this particular craft and, come to think of it, every other job in a rock band -- drummer, keyboardist, bass player -- except singer. The only interesting question is why. Saturday, August 21, 2004Dammot, I'm a Deaniac.
This is just a preview of a column by Howard Dean, but seriously, I love this man.
Dean is a centrist, that's not really debatable and certainly evidenced by the fact that he only won his fifth term as Governor of Vermont by just over 50% because he had a challenger on his right, and on his left. I always thought I was a die-hard leftie, but maybe I'm a centrist. Maybe being a centrist just means doing what makes sense. With Clinton centrism was a political calculation, the third way. With Dean it's a thought process. I hope he never goes away.
Asa, you will be delighted to know that I recently purchased this off Amazon.com. Once it's at my place, I expect you to be at my place.
Friday, August 20, 2004Cover Story
I'm now officially a huge fan of DC Comics Presents, the tribute series to the late, great, Julius Schwartz. I bought the Atom and Flash issues yesterday and enjoyed both. Even Jeph Loeb's poorly plotted "writing" couldn't detract from the glory that was reading an actual Barry Allen Flash story. Oh, and The Atom issue is definitely in my top 50 "Greatest Comic Covers of All-Time." Atom strapped to a grenade; that's what comics are all about. And that's what The Hand is about. Just wait, dear readers. Just wait.
Learning is fun
defective yeti presents a quick and humorous ("Okay, here we go: porn. Finally something I can comprehend.") guide to the plaque that was attached to the Pioneer 10 spacecraft.
So when does Star Trek 11 come out? I can't wait to see what P'neer has been up to. The Olympic Village
BEWARE! SPOILERS FOR THE VILLAGE AHEAD!
Because the miniature play is the art form of the future, and we just saw the damn movie last night, Alan and I present to you: The Olympic Village Bela Karoli: *walks in with Kerri Strug in arms* I not believe her dead. It make wonder why we chose settle here, but we did, and now we never leave, even if becomes exceedingly clear that this idea horrible. After all, Athens is a heap. Mary Lou Retton: I love you Michael Phelps. Michael Phelps: *busy winning gold medal* Carly Patterson: You love me Michael Phelps. Michael Phelps: It's true, let's get married! *wins gold medal* Carly Patterson: Mary Lou Retton will settle for The Thorpedo. He's like a torpedo that swims! Bela Karoli: Carly Patterson, I know you love him, but Michael Phelps ask to leave Olympic Village. We suspect he see Romanian Gymnastic Team We Do Not Speak Of and use Dope We Do Not Use. Paul Hamm: My voice is sooooo high that even as an Olympic champion, nobody will sleep with me. You love Carly Patterson. *stabs Michael Phelps* Michael Phelps: *wins silver medal* Carly Patterson: I love him! Let me go to the towns. Bela Karoli: Don't scream Carly, but I must tell you that Romanian Gymnastic Team We Do Not Speak of is false. Rumors of Romanian Team in these woods, but we coaches wear unitards to scare the other Olympians. Now take Credit Card We Do Not Speak Of (American Express), and go to towns. Carly Patterson: It seems preposterous that I should be able to walk through these woods blind, but I guess love is guiding me or something stupid like that. Paul Hamm: ARGHH! I am Dragulescu, a top Romanian Gymnast! Carly Patterson: *Kills Paul Hamm* Paul Hamm: *Releases helium from skull* Bela Karoli: It is actually 2004! Olympians: We know, all the signs say Athens 2004. Amanda Beard: *Gets hot and heavy action in the hot tub with Aaron Piersol and Catelin Sandeno* M. Night Shyamalan: In case you were wondering, here is some exposition. I think I have a point, but now it is hopelessly muddled. Look at me in that artsy reflection! I'm so hot right now. Carly Patterson: I have returned with medicines! Michael Phelps: *Wins gold medal* -End- Thursday, August 19, 2004Paging Dr. Pennywhistle...Paging Dr. Pennywhistle
These girls need sex, stat!
Looks like there's an exceedingly rare case of "mass hysteria" striking cheerleaders in some rural North Carolina High School. And yes, I find this hilarious. Be healthy, eat crap
The Big Buy sized box of Pop-Tarts that I bought for the office this morning as a big old seal on the front which reads: "Child Nutrition Program Approved." On the side of the box it goes on to tell us that "This product qualifies for the USDA Child Caare Nutrition Program."
Pop Tarts? Are they fucking insane? Here are the first ingredients listed for Pop-Tarts... Strawberry Pop-Tarts: Corn Syrup. Brown Sugar-Cinnamon Pop-Tarts: Brown Sugar. This is the natural evolution of "Ketchup is a vegetable." This is just gross. Shame on you, USDA. Monday, August 16, 2004
Walter Cronkite probably hates our blog
The old-timer comes down on hard on the Internet and "would-be writers." If Cronkite can't stand New Media (tabloid reporting and all), I take that to mean we're doing something right. And now that's he's got me going, head on over to the Electronic Frontier Foundation and do your part in making the web the most open, democratic, anything-goes place in the Universe.
John Kerry may love and try to emulate JFK, but his stance on space exploration leaves much to be desired. (Although, I'm sure his campaign will probably try to write this off by saying Kerry simply holds a "nuanced" position on space exploration.)
Anyway, as Chris Hitchens wrote recently in a NYT article, "how often have you met a self-described Kerry supporter?" Between the Deaniacs, Moore-ites, Progressives, Clintonites, Socialists, Reagan Democrats, Black Democrats, Neo-Isolationists, trade unions, and academics, is there truly *anyone* on the Modern Left who is an unbridled Kerry lover first and foremost? I think this is supposed to be bad luck...
But check this out. Between the huge crowds (50,000 in Portland) and the gilt falling off the current administration at record pace, this could be a
Kerry Landslide. rational disclaimer: Election far off. Anything can happen.
I've actually never realized until now, but this year's election has to be the best example yet that our country is really just an oligarchy. I know it's a bit cliche to say that politicians are out of touch and intersted only in special interests, but it's so absolutely true this year. When it boils down to it, we have A Wealthy Son-of-Bitch running against A Rich Asshole. A Texas Oil Baron against a New England Aristocrat. 225 years of "progress" and our political leaders still hail from either Dixie or Massachusetts. I seethe everytime Kerry speaks of "Two Americas" and then retires to his yacht and mansions; or Bush jets off to his ranch for a "working vacation." And this is all coming from someone (me!) who would love to be rich, famous, and powerful. That's the American Dream for ya.
Veteran Gap!
GOP and Demos have been competing to see who can get the most veterans at their respective conventions. 15% of the delegates at the GOP convention are vets. Compared to 12% of the delegates at the Demo convention. Both record highs. Sunday, August 15, 2004Civil what now?
Iraqi troops refuse to fight Iraqis: "We received a report that a whole battalion (in Najaf) threw down their rifles,' said one high-ranking defense ministry official, who didn't want his name published because he's not an official spokesman. 'We expected this, and we expect it again and again.'
[snip] "I'm ready to fight for my country's independence and for my country's stability," one lieutenant colonel said. "But I won't fight my own people." "No way," added another officer, who said his brother - a colonel - quit the same day he received orders to serve in the field. "These are my people. Why should I fight someone just because he has a difference in opinion about the future of the country?" This is bad for us in that we want the new Iraqi army to be fighting insurgents and maintaining security, but isn't it also precisely the attitude we should want from Iraqis? A sense of national unity and an idea that they want a stable country, but don't want bloodshed to achieve it? After all, wasn't our country founded in a specific way so as to achieve regular bloodless transitions of power? If that's the goal Iraqis want to work towards more power to them. But that only works if they all agree to it. There's still all those folks in Najaf with guns.
So much for the "Olympic Spirit."
In this very retro Greek Olympics, Iranian Judo champ Arash Miresmaeili is channeling Berlin 1936. Miresmaeili won't compete with Israelis because, well, they're Jews. Saturday, August 14, 2004
Am I the only person who still thinks it's weird everytime he sees a Sonic the Hedgehog game come out on a *gasp* Nintendo console?
Friday, August 13, 2004
So, uh, I'm watching K-19: The Widowmaker right now and I've realized that it's essentially Das Boot, only the filmmakers have replaced noble Nazis with noble Commies. Oh, and Indiana Jones does a truly terrible Russian "accent." The flick sure does look nice, however.
Thursday, August 12, 2004Oh, come onFDA Warns of Terrorist Drug Tampering : "Crawford said the possibility of such an attack was the most serious of his concerns about the increase in states and municipalities trying to import drugs from Canada to save money." But they don't politicize the terror warnings. No sir. Maybe the terrorists are putting anthrax in our oil. We should stop buying that, too. The Olympics are coming...
And Alan has a nice little post about why they (and sports in general) can be darn important.
Scandalous!
New Jersey's governor is a "gay American." Oh, yeah. He resigns, too. Check out the pics of his cutie wife. I told you this was scandalous. HOLY SWEET BEJEESUS!
NEWSARAMA - WALKING THE STREETS OF GOTHAM: LAPHAM TALKS DETECTIVE COMICS
David Lapham, of Stray Bullets and Murder Me Dead "fame" is going to do a twelve issue run on Detective Comics. I don't think I've heard anything that exciting in a very long time. I loves me some David Lapham. He's perfect for the title. I really just can't wait. Plus it will even out the thoroughly mediocre Judd Winick on Batman. ps- I love Identity Crisis.
Me, a retard? Ha. Asa's eugenically impure bloodlines have surely clogged his view of my natural brilliance and overall genius.
Wednesday, August 11, 2004Mastodon City HOOOOOO
Hi.
Whoever you are I hope you enjoy Mastodon City and poke around. I'd like to take a moment to give a very special thanks to Liz Miller, who basically taught me HTML so I could make this lovely little website. She can be found at greenfireburning. This a slow news week, otherwise Alex and I might already be tearing it up over politics. Are we the first bipartisan political blog? We're the first one I've heard of. Go us! We're the new spirit of national togetherness! Alex is a retard.
And so it begins...
My first post here on this marvelous wonder of website. Inside one can find just about anything his imagination desires. Commentary on politics. Links to some of the finest blogs of our time. And of course, comics dealing with secret agents, 19th century gynecologists, tyrannical cruise line directors, and a world where men ride woolly mammoths -- in the arctic. Clearly, MastodonCity.com is no ordinary website. In fact, it's not so much a website as it as a portal into the genius that lies within the shared brain Asa and I like to call, "The Quad-Hyphe." Where's the minotaur?
Damn but does this sound awesome.
Cartunnel: a comix fluxture It's extemely rare that I wish to live in New York. This is one of those times. Tuesday, August 10, 2004What we have here is a void.
Voids weren't always meant to be filled.
Who could fill space, for instance? You couldn't, and neither could anyone else. Because space is already as filled as it can possibly be. What with it containing all that there is, and whatnot. But I'd like to see you try. And if you did it I would laugh and then throw myself into the sun. Except I couldn't get to the sun, because it would be all filled up with the crap that you've been hurling into space, you jerk. |
|
March 2007: I don't know. This month is bullshit.